HAS ANYONE SEEN MY SANITY?…i seem to have misplaced it

Sometimes I lock myself  in the toilet to get some peace. I’m sure this is fucked up stupidity quite normal behaviour..No? Well I dont give a shit it usually works for a little while.

Except for tonight when bubalicious bubs stalked me…I locked the door and told him to nick off.

No I cant!! he says [ which sounds hilarious cos he’s decided to pronounciate like an American this week…cant..ant..you get it]

He starts banging on the door…’Come on!…whats going on in there hey!’…he says

‘Nothing.. go and watch TV with your father’..says I.

So then he starts rattling the door handle like crazy. I tell him to stop.

‘I cant I cant!!’ he says…’I’m outta control!!’.I’m way outta control!!’

‘The handles gonna snap off!! see it see it!!’  There’s a hole! a hole!’

The kids on drugs ‘ fer sher’.

And I think he even bodyslammed the door a few times.

And all the while I’ve been writing this he’s been at my side jibbering like a lunatic  telling me to come in the lounge room, come in the lounge room.

Aparently I’m not to move from said lounge room. Ever.

He’s also taken to calling me a ‘suck up’. I dont know where the hell he got that from.

We all know it’s ‘suck it’…not suck up….

Dont they teach him anything on his one day of daycare?..

Fuck I miss my zoloft sometimes…..

JMM has informed me of his desire for me to finish our totally fucking bizaro courtship story, on account of him feeling that he came off as an arsehole…..Mmmmmm…

So I shall be finishing that story…one day soon. I just need to find me a

bigger fucking door to hide behind. With an even bigger lock.

And vodka

Tomorrow night we’re off to see the Monster trucks…Scooby Doo and batman and the scooby doo jet van and stuff.

I’m totally shitting myself cos after being fucked anally  paying $140 to get into this joint, it’s highly likley bubs will only make it through an hour before he has a total meltdown and we have to go home.

He excells at this…

later dudes.


~ by shelly1971 on March 6, 2009.

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